What’s so Special about Your Practice? An unabashed(?) Confession of Vancouver-based Psychotherapist

“What’s so special about your practice? What makes you (Julie) unique and the right fit for me?” I’ve been asked this question by new clients from time to time in inquiry calls and first sessions and I’ve always felt a bit stumped at first because of my cultural background that has ingrained into me theContinue reading “What’s so Special about Your Practice? An unabashed(?) Confession of Vancouver-based Psychotherapist”

The Importance of Indigenous Issues for East Asians

I’ve been talking to clients about the meaning of the National Day for Truth and Reconciliation and noticed distinct cultural differences in people’s reactions, which is in line with an ongoing psychoeducational discussion with some of my East-Asian clients. I have two primary groups of East Asian clients, one group that endorses more traditional value;Continue reading “The Importance of Indigenous Issues for East Asians”

Avoidant Attachment vs. Avoidant Personality Disorder: What’s the Difference?

Professionally and personally, I have recently become tired of seeing misleading advice on how to deal with so-called “avoidant personalities”? The terms “avoidant attachment” and “avoidant personality disorder” are often used interchangeably, especially on the popular Chinese social media, “REDNote (xiaohongshu),” but they represent distinct psychological concepts. In this post, we’ll explore the differences betweenContinue reading “Avoidant Attachment vs. Avoidant Personality Disorder: What’s the Difference?”

A Moment of Connection: Breaking the Cycle of Emotional Repression from Cultural Influences

Last month in sessions, I almost cried twice. One of those times was during a parent-child/family session. My main client was a very young child of kindergarten age who could not sit still and often became distracted during sessions. Initially, the child kept watching their father’s reactions to see if it was okay to fidgetContinue reading “A Moment of Connection: Breaking the Cycle of Emotional Repression from Cultural Influences”

Some Embarrassing Moments as a Therapist

A recent personal embarrassment reminded me that, coincidentally, several of my clients and I have been working on overcoming moments of embarrassment this summer. Some clients struggle with the cultural aspect of “face” and feeling embarrassed when they think others would secretly judge themselves or their partners for not being able to articulate a good-enoughContinue reading “Some Embarrassing Moments as a Therapist”

5 Ways to Improve the Attentional Focus of Your Child with ADHD

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a common neurodevelopmental disorder that affects many school-age children. Children with ADHD often find it challenging to sustain attention on tasks, leading to academic and social difficulties. Developing strategies to help these children pay attention is crucial to their social, interpersonal, and scholastic success. Here are five strategies thatContinue reading “5 Ways to Improve the Attentional Focus of Your Child with ADHD”

Hearing Between the Lines in Child Therapy

*For the sake of brevity, I will refer to all young individuals of minority age as “children” or “child” in this post. I feel lucky in the fact that I have the privilege of working with several children on a long-term basis – and I mean it. As I have mentioned in my previous post,Continue reading “Hearing Between the Lines in Child Therapy”

兒童做心理諮詢時的信心培養

收到了分享患者經驗的請求,所以想在這裡分享一個來說明和孩子作治療的觀察和感想,也希望能讓大家瞭解心理諮詢,治療的一些過程。 我有一些孩子患者,幾乎所有人都有焦慮症狀。通常孩子們都是被家長或老師迫接受治療的,但幸運的是這群孩子大多都自願來,或在網上搜索後要求見我,所以非常欣慰能夠從一開始就能與他們建立良好的關係。 其中一位在過去的幾周前開始來面見,有很大的進步。這孩子從新冠肺炎流行開始就一直高度焦慮,到無法正常生活的地步,所以有改善他自己很高興。在他好轉之前,因為焦慮,很難自發說話,也常常一問三不知,不是故意不回答而是太敏感了,所以一當被問問題就開始結巴說不知道。 現在他身體反應開始好轉放鬆,我們也好不容易可以有更深入地交談,然後他突然就分享了他的家人的事情。 一開始見面時我就有從他父母那裡知道他們有一段痛苦的分手離婚期,幾乎就像一部肥皂劇,非常曲折。細節不透露,但有很多激烈的衝突。因爲主治方案是日常焦慮,也考慮到道德問題(其一是他父母也不是主要患者),所以我還沒深度跟進也尊重孩子和家長的隱私。因此當他自己提起時我警覺到這可能是下意識求救的訊號,其中原因之一是因他告訴我幾年前親眼目睹的一些事情。以前當他的父母吵架時,他說妹妹會害怕躲在房間裡哭 (我以前也見過小妹妹,也覺得她有點受到創傷的感覺)。他告訴我他那時很擔心他的妹妹,因爲那麼小的孩子不該看到爸媽吵架的樣子,但當我問他那麼他自己呢? 他聳了聳肩說他已經習慣了。 這麼小的孩子會說這樣的話聽到時真的很心疼,就算再如何早熟他自己也是個孩子呀!同時我也很欣慰,因為這表明自己跟他的關係更進了一步,也有了信任。 當孩子接受治療時,很多父母會問我需要多長時間才能好起來。這不取決於我,而是取決於孩子,特別是因為在諮詢治療中我們需要時間來建立信任,而治療的成功建立在信任之上。 在與孩子打交道時,我們需要不同的耐心,要把他們跟大人一樣當作是合作的同伴而不是受指示的“病人”。孩子們如果在加長大,就算家長自己不認同心理諮詢,他們也通常更容易接受治療。與大人相比他們也比較沒咱們華人文化的拘束,像會在乎“面子”或認為他們需要psychotherapy就表示他們失敗了等偏見思想。通常這些孩子會更願意接受心理健康作為正常日常生活的一部分而不是病人才要會做的事,在求學時如遇問題也會更早求助,提高學業上的成功。 但是因為他們的生活中可能有一些經歷讓他們難以信任大人,所以我們通常需要花時間在進行治療之前建立信任的關係,其一就是要尊重他們的自主權和意見。希望華人父母可以理解孩子的信任是要培養的,不是與生俱來的親子權力,並認識到孩子願意敞開心扉是多麼珍貴。

Mental Health Workshop for Graduate Students

I’m pleased to announce that I have been invited by BCCRC Graduate Student and Post Doctoral Society (GrasPods) to host a mental-health workshop for grad students! In this workshop, I will talk about some of the common “myths” about mental health (counselling/psychotherapy) and barriers that graduate students face that prevent them from accessing relevant resources.Continue reading “Mental Health Workshop for Graduate Students”